I am now selling my blood plasma for money. The screening process was brutal and I spent the entire day there yesterday, literally from 8am till 5pm. As one can imagine, they are very thorough in the screening process.
It starts with a credential check and I handed over my driver's license, my social security card and my proof of address, ( a letter mailed to me at David's was sufficient). They held on to these documents which caused me more than a bit of anxiety, I was so concerned about not getting them back. My worry was for naught, they have the system down to a science and each time I was called in for another step of the process, I could see my docs clipped to my chart.
The lobby chairs were surprisingly comfortable even though they were not padded they had good back support and a comfortable seat, at least for my body. There was a large flat screen television on the end of the room closest to the desk and when I got there Anger Management was playing. I settled in to read my book, looking up occasionally when the room started laughing out loud at the movie. I wondered how I would feel about the chairs by the end of the screening process. I had been forewarned that I would be there from six to eight hours. I came armed with a new book, a roast beef sandwich, a large and a small bottle of water, an apple and some chips. I had eaten a good breakfast per my instructions, so felt prepared for whatever came my way.
Next they call you in to the back for a vein check. I peeled off my three layers of jackets to allow the inspection and was told, as I figured, I had prime veins for the task. She told me to use my left arm for donation as it was the better of the two. I then sat reading my book for a couple of hours before my name was called again to give them a urine sample. Afterwards I went back to the lobby waiting area with the other hundred or so people as desperate for money as I am and waited some more. This time I chose a seat closer to the front on the end of a row, unfortunately I sat next to a talker, who did not seem to care if I read my book and mostly ignored her, but talked anyway, which annoyed me to no end. I thought about moving, but just decided to ride it out. Big mistake.
Next I was called into the medical supervisors office with two other people to have twenty seven pages of rules and information read aloud to me. In 1980 when I married to Mr. Reyes in Las Vegas and we joked after our very brief ceremony that we had been married by the fast talker. This woman, with her heavy Philippine accent, put that guy to shame. I could barely keep up with her while I was reading along! I figured she had read that booklet so many times she probably knew it by heart, what a job!
My next call was to enter a small room where a person took my temperature and blood pressure and weighed me on a scale that was hooked to her computer, but had no numbers on my side. Frankly, I was grateful to not know the number. But, drat, my blood pressure and pulse rate were too high. The monitor read 154 over 113, and while I have no idea what those numbers mean, she told me I had to have my lower number below 100 to be able to donate, she asked me if I had consumed caffeine and I told her no, but I did get pretty excited when she called my name, maybe that was it. Or maybe it was the movies playing in the lobby, after Anger Management, I sat through The Reaping with Hilary Swank and The Eye with Jessica Alba, and currently playing was I am Legend with Will Smith, not exactly movies that inspire relaxation. She sent me back to the waiting room to see if my pressure would come down in the next fifteen minutes. I sat in my chair with my eyes closed breathing deep and trying to relax. She called me back fifteen or twenty minutes later and my number was down to 103, but still not low enough to donate. It was almost 1pm by this time, and I was damned if I was going to be turned away. She told me I could have another fifteen minutes and back I went to the lobby. The talker, who sat next to me every time she came back from being called, despite my attempts to ditch her, would not stop talking to me, finally I told her my blood pressure was high and I needed to meditate, so could she please stop talking to me. I must have sounded annoyed because that shut her up and she moved to another seat. Hallelujah! My third time in the exam room my blood pressure was 97, and I breathed a huge sigh of relief, thinking my blood pressure was up due the annoying talking woman. She then checked my blood levels of protein and hydration by sticking my finger and applying pressure with this tiny tube to extract the blood she needed. It was rather fascinating and I passed all tests with flying colors. I went back to the lobby and waited another hour or so before I was called for my physical exam.
I was back in the supervisor's office for the physical and she asked me my name and social security number,(they asked me this each time I went to the back of the office and you could tell these folks did not even see faces, although they were all very nice.) She gave me a test on the information she had read to us earlier and luckily I scored a 100% or else that would be that, sorry, see ya, you cannot donate. Had I missed a question and been sent home, I may have gone postal, lucky for me the test was pretty much common sense and was information I had been given three times already in the course of the day... Lists of the high risk behavior that prevents you from qualifying as a donor such as IV drug use, sex with another man or any man who has had sex with another man, prostitution (although they did not call it that, the literature just says "sex in exchange for drugs or money"), lists of countries that you cannot originate from or have visited or have had sex with someone who has been there ( most of them in Africa), and the diseases that prevent you from becoming a donor, like, duh, AIDS, HIV and several letters of Hepatitis. Once I passed the test she went on to ask me all the same questions I had answered on my original screening form, have I been to the listed countries, have I or do I use IV drugs, have I had sex with anyone with AIDS or HIV Positive, sex with a man who has had sex with other men, etc, Then we went through the list of health issues, do you have a history of heart disease, cancer, etc, etc. She also wanted the dates of my two surgeries, my tubal ligation, which I knew the exact date, and my oral surgery, which I could only give an approximate date. She wanted to know what piercings and tattoos I had, which I showed her and she marked the dates I had them done, again, I could only give approximate years. Mom and Dad were still married when I had my ears pierced the first time, and I was in junior high when I had the second set done, I think. I knew I got my tattoo in 1992, but I could not tell you what month. She marked it all down on the body mapping chart and stuck it in my file. I signed a bunch of papers attesting to the fact that we had gone through all the questions and I had answered to the best of my knowledge truthfully to all questions. Then I peeled off my layers on the top so she could listen to my heart and lungs. She did ask me before the physical exam began if I wanted someone else in the room and I almost laughed out loud. Had this tiny woman been inappropriate, I could have squished her like a bug! I should have asked her if she wanted someone in the room. Heart and lungs were good, no comments about my smoking which I appreciated. Then some prodding of my belly, a check for swollen ankles, and a check of my reflexes, all good. She sent me off, thanking me for donating and told me I would be called to donate shortly. Before I left her office, she returned my ss card and driver's license, much to my relief.
It was just before 3pm and I was back in the lobby, Norbit, the stupidest movie ever made, was just starting. A half an hour later I was called for donation. The back of the office had 6 rows of fifteen reclining bed/chairs each with it's own machine. Hanging from the cieling there are two huge flat screen TVs facing each row, playing the movie of the moment, unfortunately for me, it was Norbit, as these beds are the perfect TV watching position. I took my book with me after all the rest of my goods were stored in a cubby at the end of my bed. Soon, after detailed instructions for behavior during the process and how to watch and know what the machine is doing, I was set up on the plasma sucking machine where I would remain for the next hour. It is one IV needle with two tubes coming out of it connected to a very fancy machine and for ten minutes if takes the blood out, separates the red blood cells from the plasma and deposits the plasma into a plastic container. During this time a blood pressure cuff is attached to my arm and inflated, I am responsible for opening and closing my hand the whole time the cuff is inflated. After the ten minutes are up, the cuff deflates and I am to rest while the machine pumps my red blood cells back into my body. The process repeats in ten minute increments for an hour. It is a real relief when the rest period comes, and I am feeling the worked muscles in my hand today. It seems to me that the same red blood cells must be coming back and forth the whole time, because how could they get that far away from the tube before they are sucked back out for more plasma. I will have to ask that next time I go. Once the plasma is collected, (it is measured in mil liters and looks like it is close to a quart), I was given a large bottle of generic orange Gatorade from Costco and told I had to drink at least half of it before I could get up and walk. I am sure they were not interested in hefting a 200 plus pound woman off the floor if she fainted, or dealing with the possible injury that might occur from hitting a cement floor, and actually neither was I. Once I was cleared for take off, I was sent to the accounting office and promptly paid $30 in cash.
I was wiped out when I got home and laid on the couch till David got home at 7pm sleeping on and off the whole time. Luckily my grueling day of screening is over and from now on I schedule an appointment, my next one is on Thursday at 9:30a, and the whole process takes about an hour and a half. The original newspaper ad I responded to said you could earn up to $250, but this is not true. You can donate twice a week for as long as you want and once a year you have to go through the original screening process. This is good 'cause I won't have to borrow gas money any more till I find a job. Yippee!
